How to Help Your Pet Deal With Grief or Depression

I was searching for answers to that very question when I saw this weeks HubMob topic on HubPages. I was stunned to say the least at the lack of information out there about this very subject. Not that people are not interested I am sure rather that people are not sure where to look for help.

Many people know that animals are so in touch with the emotions, health and well-being of the people around them that this can effect a pet so drastically that some people have even suspected a pet has died as a result of the effects of grief and/or depression from loss of a beloved friend or owner even another animal they were close to.

I am not an expert on animals I just love them, thus the reason for my journey to find some answers to this question of how to help a pet deal with grief or depression. You see today I was thinking about a dog friend of mine his name is Coujur pronounced Coo-jur.

Coujur spent every night in his favorite chair on his buddies lap while he would affectionately pet him and watch television as they drifted off to sleep for a few hours before bed time. They would play out side and Coujur would wait to see him everyday, he would give a sweet little bark of delight as soon as he caught a glimpse of his friend coming home and then take off towards him at break neck speed. He would run around the yard to find a stick or favorite toy to play a game of fetch with him. Always following him around where ever he went.

My visits would always involve a game of fetch as well and a scratch behind the ears, being jumped on repeatedly to the tune of Coujur's throw it again bark, you know the one high pitched and unlike any other worldly noise known to man or well woman. I would always spend time in the yard with him he was always so happy go lucky, jumping around eager to greet you and beg a good fetch game out of you. He would jump up on my lap and he would be so excited I would have to tame his kisses as he greeted me for fear he may have recently cleaned his nether regions lol. My little boy just loves to go visit Coujur. They have a lot in common, endless energy, love to run and play and make plenty of noise.

My last visit this weekend left me with tears in my eyes and grief in my heart. Coujur is no longer the same little dog. When I first walked into the front yard I thought he is not out here he must be in the back yard. Waiting and watching for him to come running I stood there turning in circles looking in all directions to no avail. Going back through the gate I was met by my little boy eager to play with his friend he asked where he was, I told him he must be inside lets go ask. About that time my friend came out of her front door so we walked to the swing in the front yard as our conversation went briefly to another subject my little boy let out a happy high pitched, "there you are Coujur".

I wondered where he had been, looking in his direction I noticed a very slow, subdued and even sickly looking little shell of the dog he once was. Coujur was not himself at all. He had no energy and had lost a lot of weight. He walked straight passed his little friend who wanted to play and came straight to me. Coujur paused and looked up at me for a moment as if to confirm who I was and then jumped into my lap glancing at me with the saddest eyes as if to say hi, I don't feel like playing today. I nearly lost it right there but I pulled it together because of dear my friend, I didn't want to upset her at all.

I could literally feel his grief, although I visit often I have mainly visited with my friend at her work or my house so this was only the third time I had seen him since his best friend passed away. I can honestly say he is completely different every since he lost his best friend no doubt about it. I know that he going through a very deep depression and has so much grief. My friend seeing the pain in my eyes when I saw him said, "Yeah, he hides by himself in the corner of the yard over by the far swing all by himself, he just lays there, he doesn't play any more he doesn't even like to play fetch anymore".

Poor guy he is completely lost, my heart breaks for him it is so sad. With Coujur in mind I set out to find any advice I could find on this subject. I never dreamed it would be so hard to find.

• Refuse to eat, eat less or more than usual.
• Sleep more than usual or not sleeping where he used to sleep.
• Loss interest in things that he used to feel interested in.
• Stay aloof from you, family members or even your neighbors' dogs.
• Hide or stay silent most of the time.
• Seem lethargic.

This may be simular with cats, I do not know I mostly found information on dogs.

Here are a few ideas that I have found.

If the grieving dog is not in good physical condition, private instruction will probably be a better idea than a class, because the training can be customized to the dog's limitations.

It's amazing how much you can use training to help you take care of a dog. Dogs can keep learning for their entire lives. Those who do are happier and easier to help, just when they need it the most.

Take the grieving dog on more outings, if the dog enjoys outings. Maybe it's just a walk to the mailbox. It could be a ride along in the car to a drive-through window at the bank or fast food place. Maybe it's a stroll in a pleasant park, or down the block to chat with neighbors. Outings deepen the dog's bond to you, and make the dog's life more interesting.

Create rituals the dog can look forward to each day. Spend 15 minutes grooming the dog or, if the dog has short hair, giving it a rubdown. Using your positive training, teach the dog a little trick or even better a little task the dog can do for you in your daily routine. The genuine pleasure you will take in the dog's help will come through clearly to the dog.

Play games together, such as hide and seek.Feed some of the dog's daily calories through some kind of active process. You could put the food into a food-dispensing toy. You could hide pieces of the food around the house or yard. Or you could use food during training for tricks or other skills.

More ideas and information can be found at this site:

Grieving: When Your Dog Mourns the Loss of Another Dog

Adding Another Dog

Healing for the Whole Family

Still more ideas I found at another site that I thought were interesting were:

For even more on this you can check out the website Small Dogs Paradise.

If the person will not be coming home, as in the case of a deceased person or one in a (final) nursing home, be especially loving. A scratch, a stroke, a cuddle - all these can be your allies. Try to find those spots that the cat really needs to have touched and touch them. Talk about the lost person and how much you loved them. Your new cat will understand your emotion, if not your words. Share your grief with the cat. You will find a ready friend.

Soon, the cat will begin to eat again. It will half-heartedly play with you. You will recognize the change. The cat - and you, have learned to live with the loss and the hole in your hearts. You can begin now to forge ahead in a life together, sharing the memories of that special departed person.

What about those temporary separations, like a child going off to college or getting married? They leave the family pet at home and the cat feels the loss and grieves. What do you do then? If it's possible, have the person come and visit so that the cat realizes that the person isn't gone forever. If the child has gone off to college, they will be home soon enough, and the cat may just need to hear their voice once in a while. Offer the telephone to your cat's ear so it can hear the beloved voice. The first time you do this, your cat may be startled, but after that, it will be puzzled. It can recognize the voice but the smell is different. Let the cat smell the phone and realize that the voice is coming through the phone but that the person is not there. The cat will be comforted by this - it know's what a telephone is for by watching you.

In the case of divorce it will be more difficult for all concerned. The cat misses the other person in the family, that person isn't dead, the remaining person won't talk and is usually very angry. The cat has no one to understand what it feels. Try to be patient with the cat. Try to have some empathy.

For more information on cats dealing with grief you can go check out this site Cat Grief.

When your dog loses another dog or an owner he (or she) can be just as sad as a human being. Here's how you can help your grieving dog heal from a loss.

What You Can Do to Help

Use a blanket reminder--Keep an old blanket or other article with the scent of the deceased dog. By keeping out an item belonging to the dog that died, your grieving dog can remember his friend's scent. Or if your dog is grieving over someone human who either left permanently or died, let him smell an old sweater or anything belonging to the person who's now gone from his life.

Take care rides---Include your grieving dog when you do errands and go on trips. For example, if you're going through a bank drive-through or any other place where your dog is safe in the car, take him with you.

Take long walks---Take more walks with your dog so he won't be alone most of the time to grieve. Whether it's just a stroll around the block or taking him with you to the mailbox, it will be good bonding time. If you have more time, take longer walks or take him to the park to play.

For more helpful information you can go to Do Dogs Grieve? How to help Your Grieving Dog Heal

If you have any ideas or thoughts please feel free to share.